It's 'Only Flesh'
Talking with an adult entertainer
February 08, 2007
Everyone has his or her own perspective on sex and love. Most of us
consider them separate—one an action, the other an emotion. We know
this, yet sometimes it's hard not to find them entangled in our mind's
bed sheets. While most of us find this occasionally challenging, I
spoke with one woman who finds the division very clear.
MAUI TIME WEEKLY: So what would you say your job title is?
GINGER (not her real name): I would say I provide adult entertainment, but I have other people work for me as well.
What are your personal feelings about sex?
I love sex. I think more people should have sex. It is a wonderful
thing. I think if we did, the world would be a happier place. In my
mind sex is only flesh. I mean this is a business and a lot of the
people that we deal with don't want a mistress or a girlfriend. They
just want companionship and they don't want the headache that comes
with having a relationship.
What do people most misunderstand about your profession?
Most people think that the women that do this are drug addicts,
hookers or drunks and that's not it. Most of the women that do this job
have children, are on the PTA. We are soccer moms; we have two
different lives. I've seen some of the girls in the grocery store with
two kids in the shopping cart and you would never know. A lot of us are
trying to make our way through college and this is how we are doing it.
Sure, we could choose to get a waitress job and make a $100 a day or we
could do this and make $1,000 and not have to be on welfare or rely on
ex-husbands. Instead, we do it ourselves and provide for our families.
You just have to have two personalities.
What do you find that most men are looking for when they come to you?
Most of them are looking for companionship—this isn't all about sex.
A lot of times we just have lunch with them and talk to them. It is as
interesting to us as it is to them. We are never looking at our watches
thinking, "Hurry up, your time is almost up." We like it, too, because
we get to meet new people. But we also see these people at bars or at
our kids' games or with their wives. We never approach them—they never
approach us. They don't want the hassles, neither do we and it works
out great. I have never had a bad encounter, ever.
How would you describe love?
Love is something everyone has felt. We have all had our heart
broken. True love is the love you feel for your child, I don't think
there is any other love bigger than that. Love is one thing but what we
do is based on flesh. They can love their wives, they can love their
girlfriends, what we offer is companionship and flesh and that's all it
is. I have made great friends in this business, but what we do is not
based on love.
Do you think society, in general, has a healthy view on sex and love?
I think that if people were more open-minded about their sexuality,
like if they didn't have the jealousy or the head games, I think there
would be less divorces. I think most relationships end over jealousy. I
could understand if I was a wife and I found an escort's number in my
husband's wallet. But I would rather my husband have an escort's number
than a girlfriend who he would be buying things for, taking out on a
regular basis or possibly taking around my friends. I'd rather have it
the other way around.
What is your favorite part of sex?
My favorite part of sex is definitely the cigarette at the end. No,
I'm just joking. Seriously, my favorite part is getting to know them
and the whole process of that beginning stage that I enjoy. So many
different kinds of people come to see us. We have young men,
dads—grandpas, even. They are not coming to us because their spouses or
girlfriends are ugly or fat or just had babies. They come to us because
they want something different. But we are not here to hurt anyone—if I
felt like I was hurting someone I would stop in a heartbeat. MTW
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