This Week's Horoscope
May 17, 2007
Taurus (April 20-May 20)
You're tough. Sometimes that means it's your job to take more on
than, say, your partner or your friends, simply because you can. You
can handle that little bit of extra abuse or punishment, while they'd
crumple beneath the pressure. I guess you're thinking how much it sucks
to be you right now, but maybe you can see it another way: It may be
twisted, but you're actually lucky that you're strong enough to take
it, and to be able to show those you love just how much you adore them
by picking up some of their slack.
Gemini (May 21-June 20)
You did stuff a decade ago that you'd be embarrassed about now, and
chances are in 10 years you'll be sheepish about whatever you do
tomorrow. That's life. Resisting change is futile, especially this
week. Shit finds you either way, but the good stuff only comes along if
you're willing to embrace and seek out the new. Besides, if you're
really the same person you were a decade ago, I feel sorry for you. How
dull. I know you value certain things about who you were 10 years ago,
but there's a way to keep those essentials while welcoming vital
transformation. This week, show us you know how to do exactly that.
Cancer (June 21-July 22)
Some of your friends have discovered that you're a convenient
mouthpiece they can use to voice anything dissenting, unpleasant or
unpopular. Being outspoken is one of your talents, but it's also a kind
of curse. Don't let yourself play the role of ventriloquist's dummy. If
your buddies have something unpleasant to say, let them say it
themselves. They probably won't, which begs the question: if it wasn't
worth it to them to open their mouths to speak their piece, why should
Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)
My mom used to frequently (half) joke that the main reason she had
kids was for the free labor. There's nothing wrong, of course, with
giving your children chores and responsibilities, but it's important to
remember your duty to them, too. Whether you're a parent, a boss, a
teacher, or anyone who has some degree of authority over others, you
have an obligation to them as well. Their wellbeing, to some extent, is
your responsibility. Your job, especially this week, is to use that
authority in the way that will benefit them the most, not you.
Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)
I'm always astonished by how many people believe in heaven and hell.
They obviously haven't thought through their ideas to their logical
conclusions, and seen how completely preposterous and unworkable they
are. You've been a bit lazy, too. What you've chosen to put your faith
and energy into isn't as crazy as believing in heaven, hell and
purgatory, but plainly you haven't taken more than one or two mental
steps further down that path. This week, take the time to clearly
picture that trail's destination. Before you take another step, make
sure it's really someplace you'd like to go.
Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)
Maybe you're right in passing judgment, and maybe you're not. In any
case, can you shut up about it a bit? It's none of your business.
Although you've got pretty good armor between you and the world, it
does have chinks, and those you're talking shit about (however
justifiably) will find and exploit them, if you don't chill out. This
might involve temporarily removing yourself from the situations that
are pissing you off, but if that's what it takes to keep from going on
the holy righteous warpath, then that's what you ought to do.
Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)
Some say that the best offense is a good defense, and while I
disagree with that in general (especially when it's as misguided and
screwed up as our supposed "war on terror"), in your case it might be
your best strategy. You have a chance to knock down some of your
opposition before it can pose a threat. Your alternative is waiting
until those you love get hurt and fixing them up afterwards (which, of
course, you're quite good at). But wouldn't you prefer to mix it up a
bit and spare them the emotional bruises and scrapes? You can't always
do that. This week, you can.
Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)
Jack-of-all-trades, but master of none—that suits you down to the
ground, most of the time. But every once in a while you acquire a
longing to be great, truly great at something, instead of quite good at
most things. This, too, lies in your grasp, you amazing creature, but
it does involve a certain amount of sacrifice (greatness generally
always does). This week, a higher level of achievement is available to
you, but to get there you really have to be almost insanely focused,
putting pretty much everything else on the back-burner, including
family, friends, downtime and fun. Now that you know it's possible, and
what it will take, it's up to you to decide whether or not it's worth
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)
You're wiser than you think. It's not like you have all the answers,
and are ready to play spiritual advisor to all your friends. But you do
have one or two answers, ones you shouldn't hesitate to share right
away. After all, you've spent years figuring this shit out. Just think,
if you and your friends pool your collective knowledge in an open,
honest and constructive way, you'll all be that much closer to real
wisdom and enlightenment. Of course, to do that, you might have to stop
biting your tongue and just call it as you see it. Are you ready to do
that? If so, this week, let it rip.
Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)
You can only pour so much caffeine down your gullet before it ceases
to be useful. Eventually, nothing can replace a good night's sleep and
a solid meal. Similarly, trying to compensate for other lacks in your
life with artificial substitutes won't get you anywhere. You need the
real thing, whether it be love and affection, support and
encouragement, or simply a purpose in life. Luckily, this week you
should be able to get quite a bit closer to getting some of that good
stuff into your life, and forgoing coffee (or its equivalents) forever.
Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)
You're practically a shape-shifter, the way you can dramatically
take on different roles in various situations. Someone who meets you in
one context may have tremendous difficulty recognizing you in another,
because you're not at all the same. You act differently, and may even
look like someone else. This is an amazing talent, but it can also
inspire mistrust in people who require a bit more consistency in those
around them. Can you be reliable as well as flexible? If so, this week
make that undeniably clear.
Aries (March 21-April 19)
Where's your moral compass pointing these days? I think it could
benefit from a bit of stretching and exercise, because things are never
quite as black and white as you've made them out to be lately. You're
likely to be operating in a very foggy gray area, this week especially.
While in general you do have a good grasp of "right" and "wrong,"
you're not the be-all, end-all authority on the subject. Sure, you
could sit on your high horse and be hardnosed and unyielding, but
that'd be mighty hypocritical of you. Practice compassion over
principle this week. Sometime soon, you'll be glad you did.
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