2008-04-10 Columns

Eh Brah

April 10, 2008

You think you are the first haole punks ever slapped down on our shores by some drug-addled, beach-living drunk mother? I’m tired of you and your tedious little gang of Hobbits running up and down Front Street, angrily cursing and generally hating life. Now I know that you’ve pussed out on many occasions when a normal-sized person who isn’t inebriated calls you out, but the other day I heard you were pushing around a helpless drunk. What is this, Clockwork Orange? How about watching that flick all the way to the end—I think you’ll be surprised. And how can you be so angry living here in paradise? It doesn’t even rain on your leaky van. Is your life that bad?

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I think the pictures are alittle off
April 11, 2008 | 04:59 PM

These guys are small and skinny and the drunk was old. They are nostalgic about punk rock and wear each others clothes. Ive heard of them punching out one of the girls in thier clan right on front street. Ive seen them casing out the new surf shops on prison late at night. They dont surf. these little ruffians will soon be busing tables at Kimos. Thier Mama was parked out behind Lahaina market place with a flat tire on her van for four months before taking off back to thousand peaks.

Uncle

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