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June 04, 2009 WEDNESDAY, MAY 27
Last weekend, the wife and I loaded up the wagon with towels and beverages and various implements of amusement and headed for Po'olenalena Beach. It had all the makings of a perfect Saturday—until we plopped down on the sand and I started counting cigarette butts. I got to about 30 before I had to stop and snatch one from the hand of my curious two-year-old who looked like he was considering giving it a taste test. I am not some rabid anti-smoking crusader; in general I think tobacco users get a raw deal as compared to others whose habits (drinking, eating large quantities of fried food, etc.) are equally unhealthy. But this is the kind of thing that pushes me closer to the edge. Clearly it's not just one or two inconsiderate puffers tossing their soggy nicotine stubs on the ground—they're everywhere. It's disgusting, thoughtless and a genuine environmental hazard. That mini-rant was preamble to a plug: I got an e-mail today from Maui Time contributor Beau Ewan, who's also a teacher. One of his students, fifth grader Teak McAfee, is as mad about the butt flickers as I am—and she's decided to do something about it. With Beau's help, McAfee created a Web site (buttsoffmauisbeaches.com), with info, links and a petition. Check it out.
THURSDAY, MAY 28
Headline writing is an art. Skeptical? Read through any magazine or newspaper (including this one) and see how many silly, confusing or downright dumb headlines you can spot. Even those of us who make a living coming up with the dang things only churn out a good one every now and again. So it's with hesitation that I cast a stone from my glass house. And yet, I can't resist. Here's one from today's Honolulu Advertiser that qualifies for the prestigious Gee, You Don't Say award: "Catching powerful sharks takes big hooks, lots of line." Next week: "Lifting heavy things takes arms, strong muscles."
FRIDAY, MAY 29
Attention tax evaders: through June 26, you can make good on past taxes you underreported or dodged altogether without facing a penalty and with a reduced interest rate. As you've probably guessed, Hawaii (along with several other states) isn't doing this out of a sudden burst of altruism, but because desperate times call for desperate measures. Why should I pay up now when I already got away with it, you ask? Well, according to an AP report, after this little amnesty window slams shut, the state is going to ramp up auditing efforts and look to stiffen fines. Could be a bluff, and if you wanna roll the dice that's your call. We're just here to elucidate your options…. In other news: Looks like relations between the County Council and Mayor Tavares, which have mostly been too cordial for comfort, are starting to strain as the budget process nears completion. Quoted in today's Maui News, Councilman Danny Mateo, who co-chairs the finance committee, lambasted the Mayor's "business-as-usual" approach. Tavares says that while she's disappointed with some of the cuts included in the budget, she won't exercise veto power because the council would just override her. Hey, that didn't stop Gov. Lingle.
SATURDAY, MAY 30
Seriously though: it would be pretty cool to slam down that veto stamp, even symbolically.
SUNDAY, MAY 31
This is from a report in today's Maui News: "Mayor Charmaine Tavares said she was just recently assured by Maui Land & Pineapple's new interim CEO Warren Haruki that the hotly contested 255 acres at Lipoa Point are not for sale and the company has no plans to sell them." Why am I not reassured?… In other news: Just got word that Hawaii Superferry is filing for bankruptcy. At this point, all that can be said has been said. However, I'd like to reiterate for those who keep accusing us and other critics of the vessel of gloating (and worse): no one is happy about the way this thing went down; we all lost.
MONDAY, JUNE 1
Say this about Gov. Lingle: she's going out swinging. According to multiple reports, the governor is preparing to order mandatory work furloughs for all state employees—basically an across-the-board pay cut—to make up for a larger-than-expected budget deficit. Expect a flood of ire-laced sound bites and possible legal challenges from union reps and the legislators Lingle promised to "reach across the isle" and work with, both because it'll be a unilateral move made without their input and, more immediately, because it'll cut their pay (and Lingle's too, to be fair)… In other news: North Korea is testing long-range missiles, we're embroiled in two foreign wars, the economy's still in the crapper and the government is about to take control of General Motors. But you know what's really important? The 2012 presidential election. According to an AP report, less than five months after Obama took the oath of office, numerous Republican hopefuls including Gov. Bobby Jindal of Louisiana and FOX News talk show host Mike "if you want to believe you and your family came from apes that's fine" Huckabee have already visited Iowa—a mere two-and-a-half years before the Hawkeye State holds its caucuses. Sarah Palin, Mitt Romney et al better get in gear. Can't we just, like, put them all in a big steel cage and settle this quickly (and preferably bloodily)? Think of the ratings.
TUESDAY, JUNE 2
One of the most fascinating political stories of the year has been the evolution of Dick Cheney from tight-lipped behind-the-scenes puppeteer to the de facto spokesperson and legacy defender for the Bush Administration. As if this new, chatty, talk show-happy Cheney wasn't strange enough, yesterday the former Vice President went off-script in a major way. During a speech at the National Press Club, he said he supports gay marriage ("freedom means freedom for everyone") and admitted there was "never any evidence" linking Saddam Hussein's regime with the 9/11 attacks. Who is this crazy hippie and what did he do with Dick Cheney? MTW
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