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ALOHA; ACRONYMICALLY SPEAKING
December 28, 2011 | 05:08 PM

AHHH, ALOHA; DON'T IT MEAN SO-O-O MANY TINGS, BLALAH?! AND, NO, I'M NOT YELLING, I TYPE IN ALL CAPS AS IT IS EASIER FOR ME TO READ; I ONLY YELL IN PERSON. I DON'T EVEN WRITE IN CURSIVE, BUT I DO SPEAK THAT WAY.
FOR ALMOST TWENTY YEARS I HAVE REFERRED TO ALOHA AS AN ACRONYM. I HAVE LIVED IN MANY DIFFERENT PLACES IN THE GOOD OLE U.S.OF A. AND IN EVERY PLACE THE PEOPLE HAVE SUCH AN OVERWEENING OPINION OF THEMSELVES AND THEIR "WAYS" IT IS APPALLING.
THAT IS WHY I LOVE THIS LITTLE TRUISM: RACE, CULTURE, NATION, RELIGION ALL HAVE THE SAME DEFINITION; A GROUP OF PEOPLE WHO HAVE A MUCH HIGHER OPINION OF THEMSELVES THAN THEY DO OF ANYONE ELSE!
I'VE EXPERIENCED PLENTY ALOHA AS EXPRESSED AS ACCEPTING, LOVING, OPEN, HEALTHY ALTRUISTS. BUT I HAVE WITNESSED MUCH, MUCH MORE OF THE NEGATIVE CONNOTATION OF A.L.O.H.A.
A.L.O.H.A.- REFERS TO BELLIGERENT LOCALS- ANGRY, LAZY, OVERWEIGHT, HATEFUL ALCOHOLICS.
A.L.O.H.A.- REFERS TO MANY EMPLOYERS, BUSINESS "PROFESSIONALS", ELECTED OFFICIALS, ACADEMICS AND COPS- ABUSIVE, LYING, OPPRESSIVE, HYPOCRITICAL AUTHORITARIANS.
A.L.O.H.A.- REFERS TO CERTAIN "HAWAIIANS" OR "KANAKA MAOLI" (I CALL 'EM "KROCKA MAYOLI")- ARROGANT, LITIGIOUS, OBNOXIOUS, HEDONISTIC ANARCHISTS.
THERE ARE A LOT OF DIFFERENT MEANINGS PEOPLE COULD COME UP WITH FOR A.L.O.H.A.; BUT I FEEL THE MOST RELEVANT, AND ACCURATE INTERPRETATION OF "ALOHA" AS IT IS PRACTICED TODAY AND FOR LONG TIME BEFORETIME IS QUITE SIMPLY THIS INTERPRETATION,
A LOT OF HOT AIR!
A. LOT. OF. HOT. AIR.
P.S.- THIS IS MY FIRST TIME HERE, BUT, E-L-E-V-E-N COOKIES??!!
P.P.S.- ALO-O-OHA COULD STAND FOR- A LOT OF OBNOXIOUS, OVERWEIGHT HAOLE A**HOLES!

MICHAEL DIOGENES