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This Weeks Letters
SHARP KID
March 16, 2006
This week my mother and I were reading the Movie Capsules in your newspaper and realized that your writers, Heidi King and Anthony Pignataro, don't know how to summarize the movies. For example, the Date Movie summary sounds like the writer never even saw the movie: "It looks hilarious and usually spoof movies don't impress me. (HK)" The attempted movie summary here sounds as if the writer wrote the capsule while staring at the poster outside Maui Mall. I wish they would summarize the movie after they actually see it and not be so biased on what it "looks" like but rather what it "is" like. As the old saying goes, "Don't judge a book by its cover."
-Zeph Colombatto, Haiku, age 16
Calendar Editor Heidi King responds: As a matter of fact, we do write the movie capsules before we've actually seen the film. While we'd love to see all the movies in advance, time and financial constraints prevent us from doing so.
HOT DOG!
I just wanted to commend you on your hugely enlightening article on Maui's Top 10 Hot Dogs (March 2, 2006). I learned so much! With high-quality news coverage like that, I need look no further for my news. Perhaps next week you could do a piece on Maui's top 10 places to eat a steaming pile of shit!
-Jason King, via email
MMM… GOOD LOVIN'
(Editor's note: the following came to us as an Eh Brah! submission. It doesn't really work for that column, which anonymously denounces individual malcontents and parasites, but nonetheless clearly deserves publication. Enjoy.)
Eh Brah, this little message goes out to all the men of this lovely island who would rather get drunk and stoned than make love to their gorgeous, fun, smart, sexy women. Now, what is up with that? Besides myself, who is more than happy and available for some good lovin' pretty much ALL the time, I know a handful of other young women who have this complaint. Why are you boys getting drunk when you could be having great sex? That's fine if you want both and can manage both but just realize—some young women get tired of waiting around. I mean, really—what's the point of a serious relationship when it's lacking in intimacy? We want to be desired, kissed, touched and even a little naughty and nasty at times! And if you don't know what you're doing—it's our pleasure to teach you. So, don't be one of those guys who doesn't put out often enough. Us women are sexual beings and love to be pleased and please our men as well. Believe me—we will all benefit from more wonderful, happy, healthy, phenomenal SEX!!!
-Haiku Goddess